Happy 6th Birthday Natalie Renee'!!!

Happy Birthday to my angel baby!! How in the world has it already been 6 whole years since I had you on that wonderful night?! I look back and think about all the things that have happened over the years... so much. so much love, so much fun, so many milestones, so much laughter, so many tears, so many things that I wouldn't take back but some things I might change if given half the chance! :)  You have brought true joy into my life and I LOVE YOU for that everyday! :)  I loved you before you were born, wanted you everyday that you were in my belly and was so thankful that you were born healthy and happy.. look at that baby up there in that picture.. so cute, so happy, so healthy and SO loved!
It took us a while to get pregnant once we decided it was time to try.  Over a year actually.  The day I found out for sure that you were on your way was one of the best days of my life.  I had been sick for about 4-6 weeks with that I thought was a cold that just wouldn't go away.  I was working at Georgetown Haircare at the time as a Barber/Stylist.  I got up that morning and felt very sick to my stomach and really pretty dizzy.  I ate some toast thinking that that would help and thinking that I was getting the flu on top of everything else.  We lived about 35 minutes from where I worked at the time.  I left for work, drove all the way there, and couldn't get out of the car I was so dizzy... I called my boss from the car to let him know that I couldn't come in and it dawned on me sitting there that I MIGHT just be pregnant.  I left there and went straight to the store to buy a pregnancy test.  Came home and waited while the test came up.. less than two seconds later it was a plus sign very strong.  I was pregnant!!! at the time I was very close to your sisters mom so for some reason (still not sure why she was first) I called her and told her I was pregnant! Then I called your father, who at the time was at work, and said "Hey daddy, how's your day?"  He said,"Oh it's pretty good.. you know how it is.. nothing special"  I said again,"Hey daddy".. he laughed and said,"yes? did you need something?"  I said one more time, very patiently I might add.. lol.. "HEY DADDY!"  He said,"See I TOLD you you were pregnant!!!"  he had been telling me for about a week and I kept telling him there was NO way I was...  sure enough your daddy was right! Shhh... don't tell him I said that! lol ;)   My pregnancy with you was pretty normal I think.  I threw up for four months straight.. seemed to come on the day after I found out I was pregnant, like you knew I knew so it was ok to show yourself now! lol  I actually threw up on myself in the car on the way home from grandma and grandpa's one night.  that wasn't so much fun! lol ;)
Your birth was a 10 hour process.  I was induced on that Tuesday morning.. they broke my water at 9 that morning and you were born at 7:27pm that night.  I was good all day with the pain.  Watched tv, slept, hung out with daddy and your grandma all day.  The anestegiologist came in and asked if I thought I was ready for the epidural because if not he was going to go down the hall and give one to another lady and wouldn't be back for about 45 minutes or so.  I was doing so well at the time I told him I was fine and to move on! :)  Literally about five or ten minutes later the contractions got so strong that I was BEGGING your daddy to go get that man and bring him back here right away.  I had to wait.  It wasn't easy, but I got through it.. squeezing your daddy's hand the whole time.  That wonderful man came back, gave me my epidural, and things were great! :D I couldn't feel a thing.. the wonderful nurse that was taking care of me that day came in to check to see how things were progressing... the look on her face told me that things were going very nicely.. in fact my doctor had just left to go eat lunch/dinner and they had to race to call him back because you were ready to come out.. in a hurry! Dr. Gillespie barely made it into the room and you were making your grand entrance! ;) You came out at 7:27pm that night and were perfect.  10 little fingers, ten little toes and a set of lungs on you that could scare anyone! ;)  You weighed 7lbs., 1 oz. and was 21 inches long. And perfect from head to toe!

 We stayed in the hospital two days and brought you home on a cold, rainy Thursday afternoon.  We were thrilled. 6 birthdays later and I can still remember it like it was yesterday! :)
Happy birthday sweet girl. Mommy and daddy love you with all hearts and souls!!

Love,
Mommy and Daddy

I've been a very bad mommy! I should be punished!!

Maybe even put into time out! oh yes how wonderful would that be. Think I could get away with taking nap while in time out?! I doubt it. She'll sit at the end of the "time out hallway" and keep saying,"Mommy, you know there is NO sleeping in time out! And NO talking!" she will say. This isn't fair. I was bad, I should get to go into time out and do whatever I need to to calm down and regroup right?! lol


So here is the reason I should be placed into time out:
 

Now I know you are wondering what in the world could cause me to get into trouble with this picture right?  well, so there's a little back story to this.  Natalie has ALWAYS had a problem with "helping herself" in my fridge ever since she could walk and open it on her own.  There have been more than once when I've walked in to milk all over the floor, jelly spread all over the walls near the fridge, or her sitting in the bottom of the fridge eating whatever is closest to her in the fridge.  I've tried everything.. The latest thing we tried was the little lock on the fridge (see it hanging open up there on the side of the handle?) yeah, that worked for all of about two days before she had figured out how to unlock it herself.  She actually unlocks it, gets in the fridge, takes out what she wants and relocks it.  Isn't that so sweet of her?! oh yeah! so fun!  While I'm all for her being independent I'm NOT all for having to clean up the messes that she makes while I'm in the bathroom or in the laundry room switching loads or running out to the mailbox for less than 2 minutes to drop something in the mailbox.  So, here is a little different part to her background as well.. All of the sudden this Halloween season Miss Nat has become deathly afraid of ... you guessed it... spiders!! While cleaning out her sister's room the other day I came across this magnet set of insects that is a game you play with them.  So, I thought it would be a great game to play with her.  She was all excited and wanted to do so.  I took it out and set it on the floor, without opening it.  While I went to switch laundry again I noticed that she was stalking the game walking the perimeter of the room.  She got down on her hands and knees and crawled to the side of the couch where she proceeded to hide behind it.  I asked her what she was doing.  "Mommy, do you think that has spiders in it?  I doubt it since spiders are arachnids not insects right?"  I told her I thought she was right and went back to switching the laundry! Two seconds later she came flying into the laundry room and climbed up my whole body until she was sitting on top of the washer! "Mommy! You were wrong! You were wrong and you LIED to me! Why did you lie to me mommy?"  OMG.. I was cracking up then.. Apparently there were in fact two spiders in the box.  She made me take it into the other room and wouldn't go into the room where they were.. Imagine that: it was the KITCHEN!! And I placed them both on the fridge!!

 She hasn't touched it in two days!! She will say,"Mommy I'm dying of thirst, will you go get me something!?" My response is always, "Go get some water out of the fridge!"  yeah, she hasn't gone to that fridge in two days.  Now, while I feel bad for making my kid scared to go into my kitchen I haven't had to clean up spilled milk in days.. I personally think I'm a genius!!

Don't you love the spiders on her glitter pumpkin? I thought it was appropriate! :D

I am slowly figuring things out on this blog thing. It might take me a little while since I'm really not all that computer savvy. The more I have been thinking about things lately the more I think this is a great place for me to write about our life on the road to recovery! Do I believe that I can recover my child from her Autism? You bet your bottom dollar I do! Had you seen her 3 years ago you wouldn't believe she is the same child! We have come a long way and are still on the straight and narrow. She's cute right?! Look at the little face... how can you not just LOVE it?! I know, it's hard.. She's my world.. my light at the end of the tunnel on really hard days... my beat in my heart.. she wrapped me around her little finger years ago and has had my whole heart ever since... and believe me she KNOWS it! :) She's the smartest little girl I know.. She has her "issues" as all kids who have Autism do, but she has come such a long way in just three short years! We are blessed in every single way to have my little angel and I am thankful everyday she was brought into our lives. I'm hoping that from here on out I can figure out this whole blogging thing and make a wonderful blog for her to look back on and read how much her mother (and father) LOVE her!

Woohoo! I have my first follower... Thanks Jill.. I can't promise you come back but I'm thrilled you wanted to see what I had written anyways.. ;)
Today has been a stressful day.. what Autism mommy doesn't have one right? and what Autism mommy doesn't stress out over money?! I hate that when things get really tight I have to go to my parents to ask for help (I always pay them back!) but it makes me feel like such a loser of a mommy... it's tough to make ends meet these days.. there are so many things that we need, want, have to have that it's overwhelming! Some days I just wanna climb back into bed, pull the covers over my head and be done with it... but I have to keep trudging along because I have someone who depends on me to! Thank God for that otherwise I really do think I would have given up a long time ago! They (the researchers) were very smart when they said that money is the KEY problem in a marriage.. this is causing stress everywhere.. and I'm over it! And those same researchers who happen to say that the divorce rate with people who happen to have special needs children is a whopping 80% were pretty damn smart too! I can see how people would choose to walk away, give up and never look back! There are days where I want to do just that.. but then I look at my sweet little angel and I think of all the great things my dh does for us and I pull those boot straps up once again! Today is just one of those days.. I hate these type of days.. especially when there is NO chance of seeing the sun today and I have to go to my parents for a loan that I will get grief for... I'm 36, I should have it together by now right?! seriously! When I got pregnant with Ms. Nat and had her on that wonderful day of November back in 2004 I had NO clue that I would be dealing with what I am now! At the time, we had moved into this great house, Darrell had a good job and I was cutting hair.. we were "making it" just fine.. actually ahead of the game I think... Then 2 years later that "safety net" all came crashing down! Don't get me wrong, I don't blame my child and I sure don't want to change anything about her or how she came about in my life.. but there are a few things I would LOVE to change about our life now... I wish that I could work to help out in the home and take some of the stress off my husband but two things: #1 I need to be here for Ms. Nat right now and #2 the dh doesn't want me to! I love that. I'm lucky for that but I sure don't feel like I do much on days like this..

To get out of this funk I'm in I think I will tell you a little about Sunday and what my wonderful little girl decided to do..
My step daughter was here for the weekend and she and my little angel were in the living playing with beans.. now children with Autism LOVE to play in the beans because it's such a sensory thing... we've done this very same activity a thousand times and exactly the way it was happening that day too... Julia watching Natalie for me while playing in the beans while I tried to get some things done around the house... but one thing happend that day that had never happened before..
Natalie, my sweet little girl, decided that today would be the day that she would stick a bean UP her nose as far as it would go... Now here I am in my room, folding clothes.. Natalie comes in and says,"Hey mommy? I have a BEE up my nose!" or at least I THOUGHT that is what she said.. I told her to go back in the living room and play.. she did this two more times before my sd came in to tell me that it wasn't a bee but a BEAN... why that never registered with me I have no clue.. I thought she was playing a game with me about the BEE being up her nose.. OMG, she stuck a bean up her nose... PANIC set in rather quickly.. now if you have a child with Autism you know that weird situations are not ideal and that they tend to freak out said child.. Oh yes, picture this.. Me sitting on top (well shifting my weight around so I wasn't smooshing her!) of her with a pair of tweezers trying to keep her calm and pull out the bean at the same time! I would have loved to have had the camera rolling then because I bet it was a site. ;) Needless to say it didn't come out.. it was really stuck down in there pretty deep.. I got us all packed up, called our ped. which called the ER for us to let them know we were on our way, and off we went.. My child is
S C A R E D to death of the doctor's office and the whole way she was screaming," I don't wanna go to the hospital and you can't make me!" lol I typically don't really like St. Francis ER because you almost always have to wait like three hours to see the dr. This time we signed in and were moved to triage immediately and then to a room... They checked her oxygen level, which was fine and I knew it would be since she still had the other nostril and her mouth to breath out of! Once in the room she was pretty nervous but I read her, "If you give a cat a cupcake"! (Thank you soooo much Laura and family for that wonderful lifesaver!) and she calmed down some.. I left the door open so she could see who was coming and going (enclosed spaces are NOT a good thing for us!) and once the dr. and the assistant came in, Natalie looked across the hallway and guess what she saw?! A BATHROOM! She needed to potty she told me... I was pretty sure she just wanted to get out of the room and to check out the bathroom (she loves them! silly girl!) but surprisingly she was telling the truth.. The nurses and dr. were sooooo fantastic with her.. I layed her down on my chest, put my hand on her forehead and over her chest.. one of them held her leg and the other made silly faces at her while the dr. performed major extraction! lol
It actually went pretty easy.. she used this tool that essentially looks like a great big paper clip to move it around and then pulled out the big tweezers.. (I need to get a pair of those for future incidents! lol) and within a minute or so the bean was out.. Now, if you put beans in water what happens to them?! they swell right?! This bean was soft, and very swollen... it would NOT have been a good thing to wait around for our Peds office to open the next day like the nurse on duty from his service suggested.. :) Mother's instinct told me that having a bean be swallowed INTO THE LUNG would not be a good thing.. ;) whew! she got all kinds of stickers and even let the dr. check her vitals once we were all done, which btw NEVER happens at our Peds. office.. she let her listen to heart and lungs, and look into her mouth, ears, and even wanted her to check out her tongue.. this is NOT normal for my child so I was thrilled that we were making progress from a bean.. lol ;) It's amazing to me how much she can amaze me everyday! just when I am all prepared for it to be a huge fight, she takes it all in stride and makes us all laugh! The dh showed up to the hospital (he was at work and works all the way in Columbus Ind. 45 minutes away) just after they pulled it out and in time to be the hero of the day! ;) She was thrilled to see him and tell him all about the "adventure" .. I think my hands shook the rest of the day on Sunday!
Needless to say the beans will stay up on top of the fridge for a little while so we don't have anymore accidents.. ;)
Whew! What a funny story.. glad it's over..
Tricia~

So, I started doing this a really long time ago and only made ONE entry.. I thought," wow this is going to be great.. I'll be able to keep up with this and I'll be able to talk about life and maybe even get some of my vents out!" yeah it didn't work.. I actually have to say I forgot all about setting it up! Then I go onto facebook and see all these great blogs that my other friends are doing and I'm jealous! So, I promised myself that I would keep up with it.. Now I know that I need to go talk to my "blogging mommies" to help me out and get me started because there are some really great ones out there like my friend Amy's...I need to learn how to add pictures to the blog and some of the fun things that the other do like ten giggles on tuesdays or something like that.. ;)
I have to also admit that I'm a little overwhelmed by the possibility of this being an every day/every other day occurence for me! ;) we shall see how it goes and re-evaluate it in a month or so... so Welcome to A day in the life of a Super Autism mommy... (Not really sure I like the name.. might change it but it's what I could come up with a while ago..)
Tricia~

First I would like to welcome you all to my new blog.. everyone else is doing it so I thought I would jump on the bandwagon... I'm sure it's going to be a great place for me to talk about my little lady and all of our trials and tribulations!
It is a B E A utiful day here in Indiana... high will hit around 85 today and the sun is high in the sky and very bright! Love these kind of days.. and it's been a long time coming after such a long, hard winter!
I am very new to this whole blogging thing so I'm sure it is going to take me a little while to get used to how it works and "find my groove" so please bare with me! :)
I hope everyone is having a wonderful Sunday...
God bless,
~Tricia~